Worry is a prayer to the devil

Well a new week and some new news. I had my 27 week appt yesterday with my dr. and Roman grew 2 ounces weighing in at 2 lbs 2 ounces. He didn't grow as much as we had hoped but he did grow. They saw some fluid on his kidneys which is a minor concern. They don't want it to be over 7 mm on each and it was 6 mm on each. We met with the specialist perinatloogist this morning. He is going to see me every week-long with my dr. to monitor Roman...his kidneys...and his amitotic sac. His amniotic fluid is a little low but not dangerous at this time. He told me to be prepared each week I see him to be hospitalized if need be. His heart and brain looked good. We did not do the screening test for down syndrome or chromosomal abnormalities at 16 weeks and its too late to do it now. In my heart I feel that Roman is healthy. I know God has created the perfect child for me. He will be perfect in my eyes. Every child God creates has a meaning and a purpose. Kaiya was not an accident and her life holds great meaning and purpose in my life and the life of others. Yesterday after my appt I was a nervous wreck. Worrying is an understatement. I couldn't sleep and the tears kept coming worrying about all the what ifs and what could happen or be wrong etc. With all the stress that Roman is already under I know this was not good for him. Its so hard not to worry when I don't know why Kaiya died...and making sure Roman is moving like he should be...how much movement is enough etc. My cousin Amber had a dream last night. Our grandfather "Big Daddy" came to her and said "Amber Lyne' "worry is a prayer to the devil." This hit home with me. Why worry? It wont do anything good. I have been at much more peace today. I am going to stay positive and hold onto the fact that my son is in my belly and in days I will get to hold him in my arms. My dream that I've prayed for is so close! Years and years of praying and dreaming about my child and now in days I meet him face to face.

Please don't underestimate the power of prayer. I feel your prayers and Roman needs them! God is so close to me right now. He's with me every minute of every day and so is Kaiya! This is where I find comfort.