I Will Be A Wonderful Mother

I read some of the thoughts listed below from another girls blog...and added some of my own.

There are women that become mothers without effort, without thought, without patience or loss. This is such a blessing from God to not have to go through what I went through. But from another perspective...I wouldn't trade it for the world. I look at what I've been through as a blessing from God. I have longed and waited. I have cried and prayed. I have endured and planned over and over again. Then it dawned on me that it is not my plan...it is His Plan. Like most things in life, the people who truly have appreciation are those who have struggled to attain their dreams. I will notice everything about my child. I will take time to watch my child sleep, explore and discover. I will marvel at this miracle every day for the rest of my life. I will be happy when I wake in the middle of the night to the sound of my child, knowing that I can comfort, hold and feed them and that I am not waking to take another tempertature, pop another pill, take another shot, or cry tears of a broken dream. My dream will be crying for me. I count myself blessed that God has given me this insight, this special vision with which I will look upon my child. I will be a better mother for all that I have endured. I am a better wife, a better aunt, a better daughter, neighbor, friend and sister because I have known pain. I know disillusionment as I have been betrayed by my own body. I have been tried by fire and hell many never face, yet given time, I stood tall. I have prevailed!

So now, when others hurt around me, I do not run from their pain in order to save myself discomfort. I see it mourn it, and join them in theirs. I listen. And even though I cannot make it better, I can make it less lonely. I have learned the immense power of another hand holding tight to mine, of other eyes that moisten as they learn to accept the harsh truth, and when life is beyond hard. I have learned a compassion that only comes with walking in those shoes. I have learned to appreciate life.

Yes I will be a wonderful mother.